Viva La Rhumba
it all began with a google search from peru. bored and waiting for the cold
rain to end, it found me sitting in my chair, coffee-in-hand..... adventure.
a possibility to explore a no-no country with a reputation that sends
chills down the spines of billions of mothers across the world, colombia.
synonomous with the word cocaine and associcated with the worst drug cartels
the world has ever known, colombia. dangerous and mysterious, colombia.
words like paramilitary, guerillas, kidnappings all spring to the forefront
of your mind with the word colombia. colombia, now my most favorite of the
countries i've visited; friendly colombia, cultured colombia, green and
plush colombia, beautiful people colombia, BEAUTIFUL WOMEN... GO colombia,
white sand beaches colombia, towering mountains colombia, welcoming,
inexpensive, salsa..... viva la rhumba, colombia.
unsure if the money i sent to this tour agency wasn't in fact a front for
some drug cartel, i cautiously left the airport scourring the parking lot
for my name on a card signifying my entrance into the country: `Gringo
Here' was how i felt. big pack, quick drying clothes, merrel shoes. i fit
in like a black sheep at a wolves convention. half expecting not to find my
name and half expecting to be held for ransom the second my foot hit
pavement, i walked toward the car to find a friendly colombian (one of
thousands i was to meet on this journey) eagarly awaiting to show me his
most incredible country. he dropped me off at the hotel where i met the
remainder of the tour, a large group from holland with only two english
speakers and one with a proficiency in spanish. for some reason, everyone
must have majored in smoking in college because where ever we went, i felt
like the industrial section of town. two packs a day was the norm with
these guys, as if being 6'5 and blond wasn't enough of a smoke signal that
the gringos are here. this was going to be a long three cancer-filled
weeks. day one was rafting down this small puddle of a river compared to my
prior experience in peru on the apurimic but the town we went to was exactly
out of a movie. by mid-afternoon, every bar had beautiful men and women
salsa'ing to vairous decades of music. to my untrained ear, i couldn't tell
the difference between the '50s and 00's, but man, can those colombians
shake some ass. day two had us off to santa marta, a beautiful beach town
filled with gorgeous women, cheap exotic drinks, and a great steak
restaurant. in preparation for the following day, we all got loaded on
colombian beer. the next day began our trek to the lost city (from my
description, the question will be lost or purposefully forgotten). think
the trek to machu picchu but twice the days hiking, six and not three, hot
and humid and not temperate or cool, torrential rains every day, mosquitos
that could carry off small children and probably use deet as their
aftershave lotion, isolation with no nearby towns with maybe twenty people
passing through a week, steep rocky green cliffs, mist, indians,
paramilitary, hammocks, cocaine factories (thousands), poisonous snakes,
oh... and no porters to carry all your crap across rivers or up the 2000
steps at the end. it was great!! after day one and the first of the
torrential rains, all of our clothes got soaked and remained wet until the
final day; welcome to a rainforest. the terrain was steep, muddy, rocky and
often you would play chicken with wild pigs. multiple times, across our
path, our guide would use some word i definately know wasn't in my
dictionary and would quickly jump out of the way with a trail of gringos
following suite like a silly game of follow the leader. down the trail
would head some nasty looking snake probably hungry for some foreign gringo
meat; soft and fatty and not wanting with a natural marinade of msg. often,
they were black and big with a face large enough for a personality and name
like bubba or killer or sandra. once, it was a coral snake, and once, our
guide no tiene ni puta idea what kind of snake it was but he wasn't getting
any closer than the rest of us. of course big hairy spiders the size of
your hand and centipedes big enough for a meal if you dared to try were the
norm. on our way back through the river we had previously crossed, we
noticed a substantial rise in the level to now above our heads requiring a
dummy cart suspended on a thin, rusty wire 50ft above the rocky surface
below (no US regulations here). luckily, i was the last to go... sparing
details, that was fucking crazy; a jump and a prayer without anyone holding
the cart or the rope in check, before my feet entered the plane of the cart
there was far more movement towards the other side than i care to remember.
anyways, on the way, we were greeted by a nice young paramilitary guy that
knew our guide like an old school friend and offered us a tour of his
cocaine factory. seriously, i've got the recipe and some photos but i did
decline the offer to taste the paste before the final acetone-purification
step. for me, it's the good stuff or nothing. there's more. plenty more
like the night i was in my hammock and was attacked by hatching termites in
park tayrona, and the gorgeous views of endless green countrysides, and
cartegena... oh dear god, cartegena. what a beautiful walled city. a world
heritage city with beautiful buildings and beaches and people, good food,
and music eminating from every doorstep. go there!! aaahhhhhhhhhhh, and
medellin. friendly people (notice, this phrase is often repeated in
association with colombian people), metro system, plastic surgery, good
food, cheap beer, wonderful spring like medellin. can you tell why i plan
to spend the next several months here. my place (for $325) gives me a pool,
sauna, patio, security, turkish bath, steps to my university.... oh, and
it's fully furnished. i am repeating my previous statements: fellow
travelers are welcome. there's a party everywhere. of course that's just a
bonus because i'm really here taking spanish lessons and studying my
medicine for the continuation of my residency in july, not just getting
loaded every night.
for my fellow frisbee players... and this is important, i've joined a team
out here and will be playing in colombian nationals this december. given
this, info, it is likely a little late to join any other team. though, if
you plan to come visit now, i'm coach/player of a team called gato negro
(black cat), so you've got a space with my squad; regular workouts,
strategy sessions, and scoober/hammer practices every night of the week.
however, and even more importantly, there will be a tourney in barranquilla
during carnival in late february, a city off the north coast that
apparnently has a carnival that rivals the best of brazil. again, i repeat,
fellow adventurers and frisbee players are welcome.
if i were to give more details of all the adventures i've had, places i've
been, and things i've seen, this e-mail would never end. feel free to send
specific questions, especially if you've got plans to come visit. for now,
i am alive, well, and happy in colombia. pictures will soon follow with
each representing another thousand words or so. take care and viva la
rhumba.
kevan
